The Difference Between Dommes vs Doms

The world of BDSM has many phrases and terms you may not understand if you’re a beginner. Here’s some information about BDSM and the term dommes vs dom.

What Is BDSM?

BDSM stands for bondage, domination, sadism, and masochism. Discipline and submission are sometimes added to the formula as well. BDSM is a sexual lifestyle that involves exerting power over another person to the point of thoroughly dominating the individual. 

Some individuals refer to BDSM sexuality as "kink," which means it’s non-conventional and much different from traditional, stationary, or "wholesome" lovemaking. 

For BDSM to work effectively and not be considered abuse or mistreatment, both parties must be willing to play their roles. The submissive person must accept some painful and humiliating experiences, and the dominating party must be okay with hurting another person. Otherwise, one person may feel victimized or traumatized.

Generally, individuals do not inflict BDSM activities on each other without discussing it and consenting to it, but it can happen. It’s a fetish and lifestyle that many people enjoy, though not everyone understands it. 

Some of the most common BDSM activities include blindfolding, cuffing, gagging, whipping, spanking, beating, and various types of psychological and physical torture. 

What Is a Dom?

The term dom stands for "dominant." The dominant individual in a BDSM relationship is the one who maintains control. This person usually deals with a submissive or trains a "slave," who is someone who pledges allegiance to the dom. A dom might execute power and control using a variety of tactics. Psychological humiliation, excessive and odd sexual requests or any of the above-mentioned hardships may be parts of a dom’s interactions with a submissive. Female dominants may be inclined to withhold sex and make their subs beg for it to exercise control.  

What Is a Domme vs Dom?

The two terms domme and dom mean the same thing: dominant. Domme is a female version of the term for those who want to genderize when they discuss the topic. Dom is the male version of the term. However, some females call themselves doms, and some males call themselves domes. 

A dominatrix is a domme who plays her role as a profession. In other words, clients pay this person to perform BDSM acts on them. 

A master or mistress is a dom or domme who has successfully "owned" and trained a "slave." Slaves are subs who agree to serve their masters and obey their every command. 

Who Can Be a Dom/Domme?

Anyone can be a dom or domme, but the role mostly fits people who crave power and control. Certain personality types already exhibit dom behaviors, but they exert them on the wrong people, which makes their relationships abusive.

Those individuals might find that joining a BDSM community is much healthier and more satisfying than trying to dominate people who are not interested in being subs or masochists. Many people are interested enough in being submissive that a "natural dom" shouldn’t have a problem finding suitable playmates for their activities.

Categorised in: Kink Community

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