BDSM in Long-Distance Relationships

July 22, 2021 7:21 pm Published by Leave your thoughts

It’s hard to have intimacy in a long-distance relationship. When you don’t see each other often, you may struggle to connect in both an emotional and physical way—especially if your tastes are anything but vanilla. If you’re into BDSM, there are a few ways you can keep things spicy, even when there are hundreds of miles and plenty of hours between you.

Exploring BDSM across a long distance will help keep your physical relationship alive, but it creates a new sense of emotional intimacy, too. As always, make sure you discuss boundaries, limits and safe words before you begin:

  • Embrace technology: Why limit your Facetime calls to, well, just your face? We live in the age of technology, where it’s possible to see your partner—and all of their naughty bits—at the touch of a button. Why not use that technology to have long-distance phone sex, with a visual component? The dominant partner might choose to guide the sub through phone sex or a series of other “duties” at their whim. Or, if you’re just starting to get comfortable with the idea, you can start vanilla and work your way into the kinky parts.
  • Audio recordings: Sometimes video calls are awkward, especially if you associate Zoom and Facetime with work. Perhaps you’re just not comfortable being in front of the camera, especially when something dirty is about to happen. That’s understandable—but thankfully you can get a similar effect through regular audio recordings. Most text message apps let you record short audio clips to send to your partner. What better way to start your day than to hear your partner tell you how much they want you? Try sending your sub a message about what you want them to wear (or not wear) that day, what they should think about when they’re alone or what you plan to do to them next time you see them. Conversely, submissives can send statements of devotion to their doms.
  • Dress up for a photo session: Even if video isn’t your thing, dressing up for a sexy photo session can keep the spark alive. Buying a hot new outfit to please your dom—or sending one to your sub—can make for an exciting time. Your partner will love getting the photos, especially if you’re stepping out of your comfort zone to do it.
  • Keep a journal: Long distance can be lonely, especially if you have busy schedules. Try keeping a journal of the experience, including all the sexy things you would be doing if you were closer together. Share your journals on a regular basis.
  • Schedule time to talk: Finally, make sure you have a regular date and time to talk to each other. Keeping your remote BDSM relationship alive requires regular care.

When you’re finally physically together, why not schedule some time at the Monterey Stay and Play? Get up close and personal at our fully-equipped erotic hotel. We offer discreet accommodations so you can indulge your wildest fantasies in a safe environment.

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